Yesterday at work I was kicking ass. I dominated my sections and defeated all obstacles. I helped a million people and even had time to drink half a cup of coffee. I was winning! Until my last hour. Suddenly my vision went like this:
Like there was this weird crescent taking up my field of vision in one eye. It was like I had stared into a bright light (but I hadn't). And as the minutes ticked by, it got bigger and bigger. Until I had a huge blind spot. I got distracted by what was going on in my eye. I couldn't help anyone. I couldn't work. I couldn't even explain myself to my coworkers. BUT I ONLY HAD ONE HOUR LEFT.
Anyway. I knew instantly that I was getting a migraine. And for me, when my vision goes like that, initially there is no pain. But eventually there will be. And that is a fact. So, as I'm trying to finish my last hour of work I am panicky. I am trying to tell myself that it's just because I KNOW THAT I'M GOING TO BE IN SERIOUS PAIN SHORTLY. But that isn't the case, and it's not that I was panicky. It's that I turned fucking retarded. My I.Q. dropped 50 points. I'm not kidding. I started to think that I was stroking out. For example; somebody said, "Omega 3" and I had no idea what they were talking about. I was like, "???What the hell is that? I feel like I know that word, but I'm not sure if it's made up or not? Is that a serious word? I can't spell it. ICAN'TSPELLIT!!!" (this was all going on in my head).
GOD. Last night was dumb.
To make a short story short, because I know that you don't have all day, I did make it home. Somehow. I probably looked insane on the train with a crunched up face and a wonky eye, but at least everyone left me alone. I got to my apartment, walked in my door, took two Excedrin Migranes, picked up my dog and went to bed. And that's the story of how awesome I was.
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"your" dog??
ReplyDeleteokay. fine. OUR dog. i hate sharing though...
ReplyDeleteDude. That frickin SUCKS. Migraines are the worst. Maybe except for cancer and lupus.
ReplyDeleteHug your dog and blow raspberries on his/her tummy for me - dogs are the BEST, except for NOTHING!
Sarah xxx
PS Awesome art.
PPS Do your dog's feet smell like popcorn?
I've found that if you walk around with a squished up face and a wonky eye people usually leave you alone. It works great when you don't really feel like working. Just try and act a little "simple" and people don't bother asking you stuff. I'm serious. I used it all the time when I worked at a health food store...
ReplyDeleteDon't judge me..