Advice from my mom:

Me: I'm going to hangout with one of my friends probably.

Mom: Is it a guy?

Me: Yeah.

Mom: He better not be making a booty-call.

Me: WHAT? No, Mom, he is not making a booty-call.

Mom: Good. Because that's not allowed. You can't have guys making booty-calls on you.

Me: OHMYGOD. Mom. What if I make a booty-call? Is that allowed?

Mom: Yeah. That's fine. You can make the booty-calls. You should hang a cow over your bed too.

Me: What are you talking about 'hang a cow over my bed'?

Mom: It will remind them that the milk isn't for free.