Thursday, August 19, 2010

...and then I did a bunch of shit I said I would never do...

I started biking to work. Pretty much religiously, as long as it's not raining. It is 4.1 miles to and from work, which means that I'm biking 8.2 miles, five days a week. I was always afraid of getting hit or of something retarded happening to me, but, so far, so good...And it feels so good to be moving and doing something relatively healthy. Plus, I pass a Potbelly's Restaurant on my way home, so...SANDWICH ME!

I guess it helps that my boyfriend is a bicycle enthusiast, and he was willing to ride around with me and learn me things about the open road. As of right now, one of my favorite things to do is ride bikes all around with him. If that sounds lame, then sorry. I'm just having so much fun lately that I can hardly believe it. Seriously. SERIOUSLY.

And my phobic ass is going to actually get on a plane in about a month. Yes, I am going to go to California to meet my boyfriends family. I'm not even having panic attacks about it, I'm STRAIGHT UP excited. (I'll still get some sedatives though. I'm not Superman up in here).

It's crazy. All I want to do is eat chicken, ride bikes with my boyfriend and make jokes. Life is good.

I don't even remember how to cry.

Friday, August 13, 2010

What I think I look like when I get the hiccups:

Another 7-Eleven Adventure. Not.

Tonight I decided to indulge most of my worst vices...I went to 7-Eleven to buy cigarettes (ultra-lights [I AM trying to quit smoking you know...]), wine (4.99 bitches!), and lottery tickets (that's what poor people do!). And as obsessed as I was with getting there before they stopped selling tickets for tonights drawing, I realized after I left that I didn't remember if I had grabbed my keys to get back in my apartment...PANIC ATTACK!(My landlord's on vacation for three weeks and my boyfriend won't be home for like four and a half hours).

But after a frantic search, my auto-pilot apparently works and my keys were in my bag. Thank you Universe! I got locked out two weeks ago and luckily someone was around to let me in, but this could have been lame. I probably would have been found in my alley covered in my own pee, sweating to death while locals shot bottle rockets at my head and asked me for cigarettes and change. F that.

If I DO win the lotto, never expect to know. That's a promise I made to myself after I got like 5% common sense. I advise you to make the same promise to yourself. That's called 'advice', and if you know what's good for you, you would listen to me on this one.

Illinois OUT!

Sunday, August 8, 2010

Bit O' Perspective

One might be angry if one's boyfriend is playing a video game when one goes to sleep. Then when one wakes up for work at six a.m., said boyfriend is still playing said video game...

But as much as I like to get and give hugs and cuddles all night...I much prefer not being stabbed to death by a stranger who breaks in when the lights go off...

And that's called: having perspective.

What the FUCK was I supposed to do? ERG.

Oh. The bus...

I was waiting for the bus on my way home from work today. Totally in space. Reading something. Being hot in the sun.

Then this kid comes up to me and just starts talking. He tells me that he was going to meet his friend, but his friend wasn't there. And he asks me when the bus is coming. And he's just standing there.

It's the middle of the day and everything. But, I'm still like, shit, kid, why are you talking to strangers? (I didn't say that, but I thought it...)

So, at first I'm just kinda like, okay, I'll just keep an eye on him. I don't want any perv or weirdo to come up, you know?

Then he's asking me questions about my phone. And my bus card. And the internet. And telling me where he lives and who's he's visiting. And, I mean, I was talking to him, if for no other reason than for it to seem like we know each other. I didn't want him to start talking to a drunk or a weirdo...he was so friendly. Seriously, a real conversationalist. So, he tells me where he's going. And I'm keeping an eye out for his stop, and he doesn't know the street really, just what park it's by...And I'm thinking, should I tell him not to talk to strangers? Should I give him some life advice? What the fuck should I do? I mean, I'm fucking WORRIED about this kid...He must have been like nine or ten or something...in the big city...alone, talking to weirdos.

I mean, this kid leans over in the bus and asks this girl wearing a Cubs hat who won the game...And then he asks her who was playing...Then tells her that he likes the Sox and not the Cubs...

So, we get to where I'm pretty sure is his stop and I tell him, 'This is your stop right?' And up he jumps, in mid-sentence. He says something to the bus driver. Gets off the bus. And proceeds to try to cross in front of the bus on a green light. I mean, I wanted to walk this kid home and have a word with his parents...

I don't know, you guys. I just don't know...